soul patch
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I had a fuzzy upper lip for the first few years of our marriage. This is partly because Lara & I got married while I was in Junior High and partly because the Navy only let me have a mustache. And I did. Or so I thought. Not to mention my 90210 side-burns. |
| I look back at those photos and wonder where the caterpillar came from. I was so bent on looking "older" I decided that a mustache was my ticket to respect. It seemed to work for Tom Selleck and Alex Trebeck. I tried different versions of the stache. Squared off ends. Rounded ends. Handle-bar curves over the edge of my mouth. Pencil thin (ala Erol Flynn/Johnny Depp). Somehow I messed up one morning and ended up with a "Hitler". That had to go right away. After the Navy, I finally had the freedom to be a real man. I grew the entire beard. And then came the goatee. And the chops. I do have to be careful of looking like Chico and the Man ... I've had a few "Dan Looks" over the years (I usually cycle through them all in any given calendar year). They almost always involved the 90210 burns. Yesterday, I had a haircut that I thought looked okay before I left the barber shop. It's tough to say what happened. Somehow I just "knew" that the guy was new at this hair-cutting stuff. (His name was Cecil.) And when he spun me around in the chair to look in the huge mirror as he held the hand held mirror to show me the taper job he did on my neck, it all seemed to look ok. The problem was. My eyeglasses where still tucked neatly in my lap under the ginormous haircutting tent/bib thing that they make me wear to keep the hair off of my clothing. All I could see in the mirror was a fuzzy, blurry neatly trimmed head of hair popping out of that tent. So I tipped the guy (30%) and off I go. The first thing I do is check out the new "do" in the rear view mirror. I'm running late and I realize that this is not the same haircut that I just saw moments ago and tipped so generously. So I race home (it was my day off) and head straight to the master bath to check out the damages. I was not happy. In fact, I was convinced that I was going to go digging around the garage for the professional hair-clipper set with all of the attachments and blades and snap a #1 on that bad boy and have Lara even out my entire head. I was pretty upset. The only thing that prevented that course of action was the fact that Lara had just used my clipper set on the dog two weeks ago. There was no way on this planet I was going to let something that went through the fur of my dog's entire body go all over my head ... I had to do something. But going back to Cecil the Green Barber would have taken an other hour. I didn't have an hour. So I busted out the Mach 3. And cut off my goatee and mustache. And then I made the all-important calculated precision facial hair fashion decision of the day ... I left my soul patch in place. You know, it's that sassy tuft of hair under the lower lip ala Howie Mandel. Besides the fact that Lara feels like she's kissing another man, the folks at our LifeGroup last night and also my breakfast meeting this morning confessed that they couldn't stop staring at my soul patch. Not only did they stare at the soul patch they laughed at the soul patch! They confessed that they thought I looked like I was a much younger now that I had Mach 3'd the goatee. So much for my ticket to respect. It doesn't matter. I needed a change. And the soul patch is here to stay. (I still have the 90210 sideburns). At least for today.... | |
dude, you have to post pictures of yourself!
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Stay-tuned!
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Hey man. . . it is definitely not a bad thing to be stylin' a la "Brandon" from 90210! So keep on grooming those chops along with that soul patch! No worries, you'll still command some level of respect (even if only from the dog). . .
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I couldn't remember his name!
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