merge

notebooked

dan thompson — Tue, 06 May 2008 16:09:57 GMT

I'm usually not into chick flicks. At the same time, I consider myself a sensitive guy.

I'm finishing up one of my graduate classes on marriage counseling. My coursework requires me to choose two movies with a strong marital theme and extract concepts and thoughts that could be used in the counseling setting.

I briefly considered t The Incredibles would be a good start ... Ala, "Baby! Where's my super suit!" I needed something more though ...

As I flipped through our dvd collection at the house to work on movie #2, I found the "chick flick" section. You know the one. Movies that you leave for your wife to watch when you're stuck working late. Or movies to watch when you're stuck in the dog house and need to have some "together" time.

Movies that most men would never confess to watching alone.

And there it was. The consummate ineedatishoo chick flick right there next to Beaches......

The Notebook.

I asked Lara if she wanted to watch it with me (cause men don't watch chick flicks alone). She said she wasn't in the mood to cry.

I was stuck. For God and country. I decided to take one for the team. I would have to watch a chick flick alone.

And so I fire up the laptop and plug in the speakers and sit back in my chair with my own notebook to extract the concepts and ideas I would write about in my paper.

I mustered all the manliness that I could and settled in, determined not to let this flick get to me.

I should have known better.

I fell in love with Lara 19 years ago. And I never imagined in my wildest dreams that my capacity to love her would increase over the years.

The Notebook made me weep like a baby. I couldn't hold it together.

Especially when Lara walks in the room right when the movie ends. There was no hiding it. I was caught in a non-manly moment. I had been Notebooked.

Serving God and growing old with the woman who I pledged to honor, cherish and love is a holy privilege. My love for Lara welled over in my heart and in my eyes.

In all it's sappiness, this movie reminded me that love is a choice. It's intentional. It requires effort. And marriage is like a triangle with God at the top and the man and woman at each corner. The closer the couple draws closer to God the closer they draw to each other.

It's all about priorities and remembering our first love, God; and the gift that our spouses are to us. May I always keep God first. Lara second. Our children third. Church fourth. and Me fifth.

I think we should all be Notebooked now and then.

Ineedatishoo.

i spy

dan thompson — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 16:15:15 GMT

Furniture shopping is different than other kinds of shopping.

Besides being one of the only places where you can lay down while shopping, it is surprisingly tiring.

I am amazed about how sore my thighs get from these outings. It must be becuase I'm doing squats for a few hours to some eclectic music overhead while you're trying not to snag my cell phone on the latest micro-fiber upholstery...

I can't possibly be that I'm tired simply because I'm out of shape...

At the same time, there is the oddity of having someone following Lara & I and the kids around the ginormous store. Maybe you've met him...

Joe Bifrumeenow.

And he won't leave us alone.

He hovers. And watches us intently.

And then tries to answer questions we're not asking.

And then we ditch him around the corner by the buffets and china cabinets. All is well. And we're left alone. Just me and my family. Doing squats. Up and down on forty-three different couches.

We're doing the "Tooshy Test"; testing the furniture for comfort and lower-back support. Occasionally we find the recliner and stretch out while making silly noises of utter relaxation and contentment. I convince the kids that I'm "resting" my eyes for a few moments.

We even play a quick game of "I Spy". I see something "black". And it takes my youngest a few minutes to realize that Dad's spying the inside of his eyelids....

After standing up, I notice something out of the corner of my eye.

It's him. Joe Bifrumeenow. And he's watching us from across the showroom floor. And then we lock eyes.

He makes his move to come "check on us".

We thank him and shuffle out the front door into the blustery puffy cloud day.

My thighs hurt and I'm tired. I think I'll go home and test out the living room sofa and play another round of "I Spy"...

multi-tasking

dan thompson — Thu, 24 Apr 2008 10:51:52 GMT

Learning about God (listening) is good.

But it's not good enough.

God calls us to be DOERS of His Word.

The scientific community has estimated that good communication is 98% listening.

Hearing and listening are not the same thing. Hearing is passive. Listening is actively interacting with a message. And you interact with a message by being quiet (zipping it); allowing it to penetrate your heart (internalizing it) and working through it (processing it).

Consider this: nonverbal communication accounts for 58% of the total message. Tone of voice makes up 35% . The actual words you say account for only 7% of the total message.

You see communication is not what you say, but what the other person understands by what you say. And then what that person does in response to their understanding.

Take a listen (click the play button above) to a recent message I shared this past Sunday from the book of James 1:17-29. It's part 3 of a 9-part series on the entire book of James.

stain magnet

dan thompson — Wed, 23 Apr 2008 15:08:58 GMT

It's been a family joke for years that my brother-in-law will manage to paint his shirt with whatever he happens to be eating.

At the same time, I can't seem to wear a white shirt without a blob of coffee finding it's way on to the center of my shirt. I've also ruined a few dress shirts by putting my pen in my shirt pocket without putting the cap back on. That was painful.

I'm a stain magnet. I admit it.

This morning I pulled out one of our ginormous coffee cups. It was the Mickey Mouse mug we paid too much for at one of the 137 gift shops at the Magic Kingdom in Orlando in 2005.

And then we realized that we were out of half-and-half and that the 2% milk just won't do.

But then, that's what ice cream is for. It makes for a great clutch play for a decadent coffee experience. And so Lara dropped a scoop of the ice cream into the empty cup and poured the piping hot freshly ground and brewed Starbucks Gold Coast over the top as the coffee became nice and foamy with a slight blob of ice cream that hadn't fully melted yet.

I sit down in the living room while the music is playing; the children are playing "elephant" with some over sized blankets over their bodies as they crawl around the floor crashing into each other giggling.

I go for my first sip of the decadent coffee with the ice cream blob floating in the middle and then it happened.

My soul patch caught the ice cream blob and my white shirt I had just spent 20 minutes ironing caught the Gold Coast.

Lara laughed at me as I raced in to the kitchen to grab some paper towels. Of course my only option was to grab that last little piece of paper towel that is glued to the brown tube ...

I'm a stain magnet. It's that simple. I just can't get away from it.

It's actually the same with our life. People are stain magnets. We have the stain of sin finding it's way on to us all the time.

What's awesome as that Jesus washes away our sin. He doesn't cover it up. He washes that stain away. In fact, He makes us whiter than snow. He took on the stain of sin for all of us and actually became sin for us.

Only Jesus can deal with the stain of sin in our life. Through faith and belief in Jesus we can receive the free gift of "stain removal".

I decided not to change shirts today. I needed to be reminded of how awesome Jesus is and how un-awesome I am. Stains (sin) will always find me. I'm a stain magnet.

At the same time, Jesus will always clean me ...

When I ask Him (becuase I'm sorry I grieved Him and not simply becuase I got caught or stuck in a bad situation) and allow Him to (when I fully surrender my sin to Him and let Him clean me up without trying to clean my self up.)

outside the wake

dan thompson — Sat, 19 Apr 2008 10:23:46 GMT

I remember going out on my grandparent’s 12-person boat on Black LakeMichigan in late grade school.

There are the great memories of learning to water ski (thumbs up to go faster, thumbs down to go slower) and tying my swim trunks extra tight to avoid any mishaps when I fell.

My favorite place to water ski was outside the wake of the boat. It was always calmer and smoother outside the wake.

The challenge was always breaking over the crest of the wake to get there. Usually, that’s exactly when I would wipe out.

Getting out of the rough waters of the boat’s wake required going over the biggest rough spot of all before going into the “promised land” of the smooth glass-like waters outside the wake.

There have been times in my spiritual walk when it feels much the same. Usually, I’m trying to get up out of the water with all of might only to find myself in the choppy rough waters in the wake of the daily grind of life. I know my spiritual walk can and should be better than the choppy waters I was in marked by occasional prayer, rare study of the Bible and lots of “thumb down” to slow the speed of the chaos in my life. Many times it felt comfortable there in the wake of life. I always knew that it would be smoother and more tolerable outside the wake, yet going over that “big” wave to get there seemed to always hold me back. Being more spiritual and connected to God was always a desire, yet I couldn’t bring myself to take the right steps.

But you know, I have to be honest. When life started going faster and the years started slipping by and Lara & I started having children and then they started growing faster and faster I realized that it was time to stop staying in the comfortable wake of life. I needed to step up my spiritual walk with God. My connectedness to God was marginal. It was dull. I needed to be intentional about growing closer to Him. I couldn’t keep waiting for that day when I woke up and was suddenly “spiritual”. I needed to move outside of my comfort zone and get over the big wave.

I needed a relationship with God that was more meaningful than “Please give me this and please do that.” It dawned on me that here I was constantly asking God for something yet I never did what He asked me to do. No wonder life was so choppy. Life was about me. I needed to get outside of the wake.

And when I took those intentional actions towards investing in a true relationship with God and doing for God rather than constantly asking and taking from God; I found my spiritual life to be much smoother and less choppy. The storms of life certainly come up now and then, yet outside that wake, in an intentional relationship with God, the choppy seas are much easier to endure.

girly soap

dan thompson — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 16:56:53 GMT

I have a thing about smells. Especially when it's me.

Ever since I received that first bottle of Avon cologne in 6th grade from my Grandma Thompson, I've been all over smelling good.

In fact, my dresser is a hall of fame of men's cologne. A little dab'll do ya. Right?

But then there's the soap factor. I like a good soap that won't ex foliate every layer of skin in one use; usually bar soap.

The problem with bar soap is that after two weeks or so, it becomes the size of an oblong penny. Much like the penny crunchers at the mall that you can grind flat or that piece of silly putty that gets hard after sitting out on the table all night.

I try to use that bar to the very end. And then it cracks in half and I have to fuse them back together to get a good lather on the washcloth. It's like a hard taco shell that breaks right down the middle. It's a button for me; a nerve-ending connected directly to the irritation gland in the middle of my head. Broken soap and cracked tacos are small stuff that I seem to sweat.

The other morning, that little remnant was completely unusable, and I had a choice to make.

To use Lara's girly-soap or not to.

It's that girly liquid soap in a pink squeezable bottle that smells like mangos and tulips on the kitchen window sill in spring time.

The other day, I decided that desperate times required desperate measures...

So I used the girly-soap.

I was out of my man-soap and had to smell like a girl all day.

The good news is that I didn't have tacos for dinner.

bad boys

dan thompson — Thu, 10 Apr 2008 09:39:51 GMT

There is a certain "feeling" that comes over your entire person when you see flashing lights in your rear view mirror. It's that numb kind of "aw man, I can't believe he got me. Where was he hiding at ...."

And then there's the classic question the police officer asks ...

"Do you know why I pulled you over?"

It's just like when Dad & Mom would call me upstairs from my bedroom when I was a kid. I was certain I was busted. I just wasn't certain exactly for "what" I was busted for. And so I start searching my mind for all of the stuff that I could possibly get in trouble for.

"Do you know why I pulled you over?" (All I could hear in my head was, "Bad boys, bad boys. Whatcha gonna do when they come for you. Bad boys. Bad boys ...")

Hmm.  I wanted to say something like, "Well officer, is it for my broken tail lights, my tags bungee-corded to the rear panel, my cracked windshield from the dump truck on the highway this morning, the styrofoam peanuts that were blowing out of my window for the last 3.7 miles around suburbia, the stop sign I just rolled through or the illegal lane movement I just made while trying to sip my piping hot Starbucks?"

Instead, I said what every good law-abiding citizen says.

"No sir. Would you be kind enough to share with me exactly what obscure Maryland law I just flagrantly violated before I file a Clergy Harassment report."

He said, "Your Maryland emissions expired last June.  You should have received something in the mail last summer as a reminder."

"Really? How on earth did you learn that?"

"Mr. Thompson, I didn't have anything to do so I ran your plates while toodeling along behind you while you were singing that one Toad the Wet Sprocket song from 1992. Can I see your license and insurance?"

Nice. The pastor is two blocks from his house on the way home from work and sitting on a residential street as the entire neighborhood gathers on their front porches to see what the squad car lights are all about.

I wanted to get out of the General Ki and explain to everyone that I wasn't really a bad person and that I really didn't have black smoke coming out of my tail pipes. I wanted to explain that I received my Maryland State Vehicle Inspection in February of last year to get my plates and didn't realize that I still had to have another part of my vehicle inspected four months later.  In Indiana, you couldn't get your plates without a current emissions test....

The moms and dads on the front porches covered the eyes of their children and sent them inside to finish diner while the Bad Pastor got it.

I thanked the officer for the warning.

And drove the remaining two blocks to our house. That "numb" feeling didn't go away for about an hour. Then I got to go back to church and teach class ...

Lara & I switched cars today while she has the General Ki emissions testing completed and up to date.

Now if I could only get the cracked windshield fixed ...

Bad boys. Bad boys.

BE the church

dan thompson — Wed, 09 Apr 2008 14:44:00 GMT

Attending church doesn't require much effort beyond the motivation to roll out of bed and into a building.

What if we stopped attending church ...

... and started being the church.

The church is the body of Christ. The church is Jesus' body on earth. The church is not the building we assemble in. The church is an assembly of Christ-followers.

So what does it look like to “be” Jesus to other people?

It’s a “roll-your-sleeves-up” approach where folks do something sacrificial and servant-minded. When Jesus washed the feet of His closest followers He gave them this directive… Go and do likewise.

“Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another's feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.” John 13:14,15

What does it look like in this era to “be” the hands and feet of Jesus in the world?

We are ambassadors for Christ; His emissaries; His proxy; we are continuing the work that He did when He walked the earth. And the cool things is, we are given His Spirit to enable us for service. We're not doing it of our own ability. We rely wholly and completely on Him.

When Jesus modeled a servant’s heart, He took off His outer garments and washed His followers feet.

How can we “wash” the feet of people in our church and community?

What does it look like to personally serve God?

What does it look like to personally serve other people?

Is my "serve" sacrificial?

Here are a few SERVE ideas to consider ...

Landscaping at a neighborhood elementary school

Neighborhood redevelopment (i.e. painting run-down houses, cleaning up empty lots, painting over graffiti)

Grant-a-wish” service projects for needy families in the church

Adopt-a-room or apartment for an elderly or needy person

Special delivery care packages

Senior service projects

Disaster relief kits

Blanket or sock drive for the homeless

Car clinic

Computer clinic

Health & Wellness Fair

Art fair

“Adopt” a public school with school supply kits

Holiday meals and food baskets

Professional clothing drive for job seekers

Baby showers for pregnancy clinic.

Invite teenage girls to shop for free formal dresses donated by church members

Community clean-up of a park or beach, followed by a picnic lunch for everyone there

Let local firefighters know how much we appreciate them with a breakfast or lunch at their station

Shop for the disabled and seniors at ACC

Zoo-safari with disadvantaged children, or take them to other outings in the Metro DC/Baltimore area.

Distribute food and household supplies in attractive baskets for families suffering with illness or other crises

Parking meter feeding

Gasoline giveaway

Flower seeds during spring

Moving day burgers or pizza at apartments or dorms

Grocery cart return service

Love baskets for families in crisis

Bag of quarters giveaway outside the local Laundromat

Mother’s Day flowers

Beautification of ACC landscaping and grounds

Clean-a-Garage/Basement for single parents or the elderly at ACC

Spring Cleaning Projects at needy families at ACC

These are just ideas to generate more ideas. I want to encourage you to use those four leading questions above as a “filter” to guide your thinking. If you can determine, with some Spirit-led certainty, that “xyz” idea accomplishes “being” Jesus to other people and demonstrates personal service to God and other people, then you’re probably on the mark.

When we stop attending church and start being the church, we find that we can't do it alone. We do life together with other believers in Christ to be His representatives in our communities. And so we don't give up gathering together but rather assemble together to be the church; to give praise, glory and honor to God; to build each other up in the LORD; and to become equipped to be Jesus to other people.

You might say ...

The church has left the building ....

welcome to the team

dan thompson — Sat, 05 Apr 2008 11:15:44 GMT

ACC is growing. God is transforming lives all around us. It's humbling to be a part of what God is doing here.

ACC experienced an awesome Easter celebration a few weeks back with 470 in attendance. Maxed out parking. Maxed out children's space. Maxed out everything related to our facility.

And that's a good thing.

In the local church, we're sometimes tempted to try to "manage" growth much like Ben Bernanke and the Fed try to do with the economy.

Yet at the end of the day, God is the one who brings the increase. And far be it from me, or any other leader in the church, to try and slow down what God is doing. (For that matter, far be it from any of us to try and speed up what God is doing at times too!)

We simply need to follow His lead. And follow His timing.

God has led ACC to need a full-time Worship Arts Minister. Scott Spivey, our current part-time Worship Leader, has declined this full-time opportunity as God has directed him to continue developing other means of serving God as a vocation. His love for God and his ability to help people connect with God in worship has been awesome. And we will miss his God-honoring service to ACC.

At the same time, God has pressed upon the hearts of the ACC leadership to extend the call to serve in this new full-time ministry position to Jeremy Hazelton. He has been in full-time ministry for seven years and brings a passion to help lead other people to engage God in an intimate personal way. He and his wife Audra will join us in the early part of May. You can check out Jeremy's blog and email him at jhazelton@arundelcc.org.

We are continually in awe of how great of God we serve. We praise Him for His perfect timing and for His perfect provision.

It is our prayer, that the Baltimore/Washington DC area continue to experience the love of Christ through ACC; to experience life-change; to find their way back to God.

Welcome to the team Jeremy!

high-hanging fruit

dan thompson — Sat, 05 Apr 2008 10:41:45 GMT

Life is busy. There are tons of things going on.

All the time.

For as many things there are to do, there are exactly as many choices to make. The choice to do or not to do.

Our choices usually fall into a few broad categories. Low-hanging fruit. High hanging fruit. The matters in the low-hanging fruit category are the quick, easy matters that require little time and usually have a short-term “feel good”. High-hanging fruit are those matters in life that take more effort, require more time and are usually most rewarding giving us a “feel good” that lasts.

Most of us go through life spending our time picking low-hanging fruit. We love to clear the branches. We feel like we’ve accomplished something.

At the same time, the high-hanging fruit becomes neglected and the opportunity seems to slip away.

Living for the weekend would be low-hanging fruit. Doing just enough in life to get by is low-hanging fruit. Investing in superficial relationships. Talking only about the weather sports and your job. Existing in a marriage rather than engaging in a marriage. Meeting physical needs and basic necessities of life. The path of least-resistance. Living for personal happiness. All low-hanging fruit. We use the filter question of “What’s in it for me?” to help us decide which of the remaining low-hanging fruit we can consume.

A life-giving relationship with the Living God would be high-hanging fruit. It requires intentional effort that places the highest value on making our life about Him and not us. The beauty of this posture towards life is that by making God the source of our happiness and sense of fulfillment, we find that the low-hanging fruit in our lives becomes less appealing and less fulfilling.

We also begin to seek intentional relationships with other people that are more centered on “What’s in it for them?” rather than “What’s in it for me?” And suddenly God gives our life even more meaning and fulfillment, because we find that we are allowing Him to work in us and through us to make a difference in the lives of other people.

Loving God. Loving people. These are the two primary ways that we experience a life that is full of high-hanging fruit. Fruit that is more fulfilling and more life-giving.

If you are going through the motions of life picking low-hanging fruit by the boatload, I want to encourage you. Stop trying to make yourself happy. Stop depending on other people to make you happy.

The Living God invites you to “taste and see that the Lord is good” (Psalm 34:8). He wants you to connect to the Vine of Life. Jesus said, “Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing” (John 15:4,5).

You won’t find meaning in life outside of a relationship with Jesus. It’s up to you. Go after the high-hanging fruit. It’s not out of reach. It’s available to everyone. Connect to the Vine that gives life.